p = mv   

.... Come on in... Everyone, come in - don't dawdle and wave-drag!... That's right... gather round - all of you...

                

                       

Warning-Warning Will Robinson!

Now, let me introduce myself... I'm Vuni Vortex-H2ON*4xUYCO... But please, just call me Vuni, - because the last visitor who tried to say my full name, wound up mute after we resuscitated him!

 

Of course, dear guests, I am your eager hostess, and proprietress of The Vector - the most reputable and patronizable establishment, this side of the Void!

 

                      

Now, I'm so glad you popped by... tho' I haven't met many of your species before... We usually entertain the Pindrras and Urginians, Romulans and the odd Borg, every now and then.  Now, I hope I haven't offended anyone by calling the Borg odd, it's just that, they always want to assimilate somebody or something!  I mean, why can't they be one of a kind originals, for Tu-sar's sake!  But, that is just my opinion...

 

Anyway, back to the matter at hand... You there, let me see what your intro-graph says... du-de-de-de-da-do, uhm-huh... It says, you are a humanoid!... from the Terran System... some place called E-arth... ...Indeed!  We-eell, well - you are here now and welcome!

 

Now, pay attention all of you... As you can see, I am a Cobalian.  My kind, resides on the 27Co-Moon, here in the Charisinae.  We are a rare species... (someone is always trying to abduct one of us and profit from one of those horrible species collectors!)  But somehow, we have managed to keep a small band of Cobalians, here, where we call home.

 

Now like me, Cobalians all have this glossy, rich-blue skin, eyes - as black as black-holes, and (various - shades) of shimmery-pink hair.  I wear mine long, for I feel it is my best feature... so, please --- --- don't  --- --- step on it! ... (shuffle-shuffle)... Thank you... Now, where was I?... Oh yes, as for our form, we are very similar (that similar not simian) to your humanoid one - - - except... attached at the bottom of our two legs, are four feet, as you can see!  Yes, that's right!... Two pairs to your one... gives us a full fleet -hehehe!... And I do so love shoes, or Trekkers, as we call them.  Do you love shoes, or Trekkers?  hehehe! (ah-hem!...) Yes, of course... Now, I am 500-ultra beams old.  But, that is still  rather relatively young for a Cobalian, but I'm very astute, so don't try anything unethical, or I will be forced to deal with you... By the way, allow me to introduce you to my galactic-mate... Nerb...  He's a Lensurian, from 16S-La Tensur Moon.  That's why he's yellow, with reddish-hair and has long arms.  Isn't he handsome?  I must confess, I don't espouse inter-species relationships, but when I looked into Nerb's golden pupils... it was love at first sight!  ... Wasn't it Nerb? "____" hehehe! hehehe! (ah-hem!)

 

Oh, alright!... Now, what I was saying is, don't let Nerb's slightly - just over four feet-height, fool you!  He's very strong... Nerb... "-____"... Pick up that 5-ton lounge bar... "-____" (heave - woosh!) "-____!"

 

"Oooooh! - Weeeee! - Gasp!"...

 

... Exactly!... He could crush your puny skulls, like aluminum foil! ... Now that I've made my point... ...Oh - you can put it down now, Nerb. "-____!" (thud!)... ... Yes, as I was saying, we have some nice surprises for you... Our chefs, have been preparing their specialties of mouth-drooling delicacies!... I recommend the Lamprey and Oudh Soup, complimented with Sour-Mint Weed-Sticks! mm- mm- mm! (slurp-smack)... As for beverages, one must experience the Rindulon Ale - it packs a punch - and we may have to pry you off the bulk-head!... but get used to it!  hehehe! hehehe! hehehe! hehehe! (ah... Bam! - Kaplop!...) Thank you, Nerb. "-____"... (shuffle-shuffle) 

 

 

... And of course, we have an excellent venue... Later, we will transport you to the Tororgo games (an underwater sport), then we'll take you to all the hot Quantum spots!... and yes - ladies and gentlemen... and others... We have the famed 'Space Operas!'... ... The tragedies, the comedies, the quixotic... Yes, you have come to the right place, for a memorable and intriguing interlude!

 

Now, are there any questions?...

 

"Yes, Vuni - - Over here!"... (shuffle-shuffle)... "I am using an expense account with the Cheapcorpulus Association, and I wanted to know, if I am not completely satisfied with my experiences here... will I get my credits fully-refunded?"

 

... No. - Are there any other viable questions?... Good!  Let us proceed this way, and I'll show you to your rooms... Yes, that's it - just step over the giant slogs... (shuffle-shuffle)... They're getting ready for the 9th shift-meal rush... I know - they're slow, but they make excellent maitre'd's... And they always have delicious sauce handy for our entrees!

 

Oh... and please leave a nice big tip, after you've dined... the slogs are funny about that, and will complain to you, in the rudest manner!...

 

Oh, and another reminder, to sonar-lock your gliders, runabouts, troughs, and photon cruisers... If you don't have a sonar-lock, you can purchase one here.  The Vector, has all the latest technology - including the sonic-frequency-locks...

                

Well, here you are humanoid... the 79Au-Cabin...  Enjoy yourself and stay as long as your bregilian credits and currency will flow! - hehehe! - - - If you need anything, press your com-link and point to:  

 

OriginalMoonBee@AOL.com

... and your request will be relayed.. Onthrefa!...

 

... Come along Nerb... it's not polite to stare!.. "-____" hehehe!... I know... hehehe! hehehe! hehehe! hehehe! ...